The thoughts of yesterday’s study kept coming back to me
throughout the day. It helped me realize
how I demand perfection of my children when I don’t allow them to make mistakes, and how it keeps them from
learning. Yesterday I reprimanded my
oldest in a way I have never done before, I think for the better. Maybe it was my hormone imbalance, maybe it
was my recent studies of Gandhi, and maybe it was my growing abhorrence of
sin… Yesterday morning (during scripture
study no less) my 3 year old was trying to pull the string for the curtains to
open the blinds. My oldest decided she
didn’t want her to do that and took it upon herself (despite my encouragement
to leave her alone) to enforce her will on her sister. It didn’t go in her favor, so my oldest who
is 7 bit my three year old daughter on the hip.
It wasn’t terribly hard and I do believe she did use self-restraint, but
the whole matter outraged me and my anger ran hot. I spanked the perpetrator and tried to
console the hurt one. Allie sat in time
out for a while until she told me she was ready to apologize and be nice. That’s when it all came out of me. I cried and pleaded with her; I told her how
much it hurt me to see her hurt her sister.
I told her of actions and consequences and how our actions affect
others; and how Heavenly Father feels about it. I suppose because of my tears, she started
crying too. Her tears looked more like
drama, but they were real tears. It felt
like that time stood still as we shared those few tender moments.
“He did deliver me from bondage” p. 134
I love the transitioning effect of her words that lift me:
“And yet everywhere
we look, the creation of God mirrors the eternal truth of life’s transcendent,
pulsating rhythm – ever wavering and yet ever progressing.”
She also uses the example of the body, another natural
system! I love seeing truth lessons in
nature. It truly liberates me!
This is distilled wisdom:
“In the ten years in
which I have been consciously trying to apply these principles, I have observed
that all other wrongdoing or sin I get into begins when I forget that I of
myself am nothing. The minute I start
insisting that my will be done, I lose my peace and serenity.”
I look forward to the day I can say of myself “after ten years
of consciously trying to apply these principles…” This is also a great starting place to look
next time I feel I have lost it.
“He is always “with”
us, in the sense that He is always aware of us and awaits our genuine,
heart-deep turning to Him.”
“Will-power = OUR
will + HIS power.”
WOW! I love this idea
about motivation and how repentance becomes possible through grace and
mercy. ! Wow ! I never thought of it that way before; that
is truly incredible.
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