12-15-11 "He did deliver me from bondage", p. 154


12-15-11

I was thinking about ‘being perfected in Him’ yesterday.  As I was doing my chores, in the back of my mind I was examining my self-expectations.  It seems that my idea of being perfect is being highly competent; being able to independently run a well flowing household all by myself; to be able to accomplish all the good intentions I have.  I supposed that if I were as ‘perfect’ as I wanted to be than I might not need anyone else to help me.  I know this idea is contrary to my mission of creating synergy.  People don’t necessarily become interdependent because they are completely self-independent, do they?  I mean, don’t they have a NEED to become interdependent because they want to accomplish something they can’t do on their own?  If I have a NEED then it’s an unmet need; an aching pain; a pressing concern, right?  So that means that God cannot grant me all of this desire to become all that I want to be, because He has bigger plans in mind.  So the thought that was so awesome to me was that this is / was my idea of ‘becoming perfect’; or ‘becoming perfected’ in MY eyes.  But what does it mean from his perspective?  In HIS eyes?  He IS the one saying it, so we need to think of what He is saying from His perspective.  If Jesus Christ is inviting us to become ‘perfected IN Him’ then what that is saying to me is that He is simply asking me to trust Him and live my life through the power of His Atonement.  He is asking me to believe and trust that mathematically speaking,

my –(negative)1 (or -1000) + infinity  still = infinity. 

He is asking me to trust that the Atonement CAN cover my weaknesses and that I WILL reap the harvest in the end.  I imagine the invitation to ‘come and be perfected in Him’ to be like going into a pool of clean pure water that can wash away all my ugliness and impurities.  (idea from The Dream Giver)  He is simply asking me to enter the waters, trusting the Holy Ghost WILL lead me in all things I need to do.  I think my hardest thing with that is that I want to see the whole vision all at once.  There is a Hymn that called “Abide with me, Tis even tide” that says ‘one step enough for me’.  I’m sorry, but it is not enough for me.  I HAVE to see the vision of where I am going.  My being able to over come all the little petty things that don’t really matter; all my hope of getting out of present circumstances to the vision I want to create for my life;  All my hope rests on it!  and if I can’t see that vision, then I can’t have hope in it.  It is the hope of the harvest-  I have to hold it in my heart in order to keep going.  It is what fuels me and keeps me going.  I have to see the horizon or else my airplane is going to crash!



“He did deliver me from bondage” p. 154

                “And above all, trust and believe in the Savior’s willingness to help your unbelief.”

Oh this is so beautiful.  I have felt this.  I know He can transform our unbelief into faith to move mountains.  I grew up with the idea that others didn’t love me and they didn’t want to help me.  Getting to a place for me to believe that Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ really wanted to help me and loved me was HUGE for me.  Having that reassurance, I think, has been the seed of me finding within me the power to overcome all that I have.  It has made all the difference. 



“No more will we be able to ignore or deny that God has power enough to heal and repair and redeem even us.  This is the most central and personal revelation we can ever receive from God.  He will carry us home, like lost and weary lambs, in His own bosom if we will stop running from the truth in our lives.” 

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